How to Read Your Partner’s Body Signals?
In this article, you will read that body signals are not magic, but pure science.
You will learn how men and women can master the art of flirting – whether you are in a relationship and doing it with your partner, or you are single and looking for a partner.
You will find descriptions of specific signals that men send to women, and other signals that women send to men – which the receiver might find difficult to interpret and understand.
Also, WHY it is so.
If it’s hard to achieve the positive results in the relationship that you desire, you will also be introduced to Couples Therapy Copenhagen with one of the country’s most skilled and effective couples therapists.
Understanding
The man only wants a happy and grateful woman.
The woman wants among many other things to be seen, heard, understood, recognized, prioritized, accommodated, and appreciated.
The reasons for these things in men and women date back to prehistoric times, that is, in the entire history of Homo Sapiens, which is about 70,000 years old – and humanity is even older.
It is a good idea to know each other in the relationship, that is, both to know oneself and to know one’s partner. If you haven’t learned to communicate with each other (see The Traffic Rules of the Relationship), and if you are not a mind reader or clairvoyant, you must be able to read your partner’s signals, and this can be really difficult. Sometimes we don’t always say what we mean.
If it had been known and easy to make a relationship work well, most people would have done it long ago. But it is neither common knowledge nor easy. However, it can fortunately be learned…..
The man and the woman have some fundamental differences.
Actually, it is only unknown to the opposite sex. Each of them considers it completely normal and natural for themselves.
But the reason for many problems in relationships is because it is unknown but hidden from the other party.
The Man’s Small Big Difference Compared to the Woman
The man only has one thing that matters to him. He just wants a happy woman.
“Happy wife – happy life”
The man wants to feel that his woman admires and respects him. That she is his biggest fan, and that she shows it clearly, both to him and to the rest of the world. Nothing else! This is the only thing that interests him and that he desires and that matters to him.
It is hard for many women to understand that it is so simple, but that is just how it is….
The Woman’s Small Big Differences Compared to the Man (which many men are not aware of)
Women are complex. Very complex with MANY facets, and that is just how it is.
Here is a list of some of the woman’s special focus points, which many men are not aware of.
Men think that women are like themselves, which is a BIG mistake!
Desired
The woman wants to be desired by her man. For the man to take on his leadership role in the relationship as a man and desire his woman, which has little to do with sex.
When the woman feels desired, she only needs to respond to this and clearly express her satisfaction, joy, and happiness.
Emotional Support
Women need to feel that the man can handle her and her emotions.
This means he can stand as THE ROCK in her emotional storm, and not run away, or go on the offensive, or come up with all his “sick” rational explanations.
Expression
The woman would rather hear bad news than no news.
The woman/feminine wants to express herself and get a response, while the man/masculine prefers to remain silent.
The woman needs to feel her man. If he is just silent and closed off, it can feel like pure torture for her.
Many men have the perception that if they don’t have good news, it’s better not to say anything.
A typical man struggles with his problems until he has a solution ready, and when he finally presents the great result to his woman, he cannot understand why she has become angry in the meantime!
Acceptance
The woman wants to be supported, accepted, and respected exactly as she is. She does not want to be changed. By the way, no one wants that.
But at the same time, it is important for her to be able to change and improve everything.
One of the tools I teach my clients is about how to prepare so that you get what you want. I call it “The White Flag“, and it is super effective.
Regular Contact
The woman wants contact with her man during the day. Either physically, by phone, or just a text message.
When she can regularly FEEL her man, it gives her security.
Exploration
The woman wants to explore and be explored. But she doesn’t want to be seen through!
At the same time, she wants her man to know her and her habits well, for example when they are at a restaurant, and the man knows what her favorite dish is and what she doesn’t like from the menu.
The man must constantly make an effort to get to know her even better – even if they have known each other for many years.
Sex and Intimacy
The woman feels the desire for sex through love and closeness – unlike the man, who feels love and closeness through sex.
There is a big difference between men and women, and it is important to realize that there is that difference.
There is nothing wrong with the difference.
It just IS.
“Lies“
Men think the woman is lying when she expresses herself bluntly.
He might say: “Yesterday you said you loved me, and today you say you hate me. Does that mean you lied to me yesterday, or are you lying today?”
But the woman is just expressing her feelings – and these change all the time.
And WHY is it like this?
Back in prehistoric times, women had to take care of the cave, the children, gather berries, find firewood, tend the fire, cook the food, and much, much more. Therefore, they developed the complex brain. Very young children needed her intuitive sense and ability to feel and understand their needs without words. Along with the other women, she had ample opportunity to exchange experiences (and feelings).
In return, she was deeply dependent on the man’s protection. She was physically weaker, and she had offspring to take care of. The woman needed to feel that the man was there for her. He must not be weak or run after other women and leave her to the wild animals. Then both she and their children would perish and die.
Men, on the other hand, only had to hunt and catch the prey. Nothing else. They could not let themselves be distracted by anything during their hunt. Otherwise, the prey would escape, and the family would starve. Men also had to defend the woman and the family against enemies and wild animals. This left little room for feelings and care. But seeing his woman happy and proud of his fantastic achievements drove him to do his utmost to protect the family and provide food.
In the relationship, you often have to do the OPPOSITE of what feels natural, easy, and simple, to get what you want (which is love, respect, recognition, and so on). If you haven’t gotten what you want so far, this may not sound completely illogical. So far, you have mostly done what felt natural, easy, simple, normal, authentic, and so on… and are you where you want to be, and have you achieved what you wanted????
Of course, it doesn’t feel good at all to do something you definitely don’t WANT to do, but if the result is attractive enough, it may be worth doing it.
Women’s Signals to Men
When women flip their hair:
If you are a man talking to a woman, and she flips her hair, or touches her hair and strokes it, it means she is interested in you.
Even women with short hair do this.
It’s the woman’s way of showing you that she cares about how she looks and that she wants to impress you.
When women handle a round object:
If a woman fiddles with a phallic-shaped object, such as a wine glass or an earring, while giving you glances, she finds you attractive.
When women unconsciously touch themselves:
Watch if the woman slowly strokes her neck, throat, or thigh.
If you play your cards right, you might also get to touch her in the same way.
When women look intently:
A long look of 4-5 seconds is incredibly enticing – and intimidating.
It is a very clear signal to the man.
When women point with their knees:
When you see a woman sitting with one leg tucked under her, there’s a good chance the knee is pointing toward the person she finds most interesting.
When women show their face:
A woman who wants to attract and keep your attention might lean her elbows on the table and place one hand on top of the other.
Then she rests her chin on her hands with her face turned directly towards you, while leaning towards you.
It is an extremely feminine and intimate gesture.
It shows you that you have her full attention and that she is open to flattery, flirting, etc.
If the woman slowly crosses one leg
over the other but looks at you, she is more interested in you than if her legs don’t move at all.
If she places her handbag on the side facing you, she is interested.
If she holds on to it tightly, then watch out!
When women ask men something:
When a woman asks the man a question, the man (mistakenly) thinks she just wants an answer to her question.
When he has answered, he believes the conversation is over.
But the truth is, when women ask the man something, it is a (secret) signal to him that she wants him to ask her something.
Preferably in the same area. And she gets disappointed if he ends the conversation after (carefully) answering her question rationally and in detail.
If they meet after work, she asks him about his day.
If he then doesn’t ask about her day, she gets either disappointed, sad, or furious.
She can feel rejected.
And the man had no idea what he did wrong.
It’s about “secret” hidden signals that lead to misunderstandings and quarrels in the relationship.
Men’s Signals to Women
The man primarily needs to “respond” to the woman’s flirting.
Therefore, he doesn’t have the same clear body signals to show his interest in the woman.
Nevertheless, there are some general rules of thumb (literally):
When men have forward-pointing thumbs:
The significance of the thumb in many hand gestures represents character strength and ego.
If a man has his hands in his pockets with his thumb sticking out, he may be attracted to you as a woman and wants to impress you.
When men sit with spread legs:
Most women know men who sit with their legs spread out in front of them, showing off their crotch.
It’s one of the man’s ways of displaying his masculinity.
His feet are firmly planted on the ground, with his legs apart, signaling that he’s not going anywhere.
When a man’s fingers point to what he wants you to notice:
When a man sticks his thumbs into his belt or pockets, he is indicating a sexually aggressive stance.
This gesture shows you that he is ready for action.
When a man looks back at a woman for a long time:
Without staring, the man responds to the woman’s long gaze.
Then there is contact!
When men make an effort with their appearance:
To make themselves more attractive, men will unconsciously adjust their clothing.
They’ll straighten their tie, brush off invisible dust from their shoulders, and adjust their pants.
They want to show the best side of themselves, and their body responds accordingly.
When men puff themselves up:
A man may place his hands on his hips to take up as much space as possible.
This makes him more visible.
He may even start rocking back and forth on the soles of his feet, as if he’s having sex with you while standing.
When a man wears tight pants or has a dangling bunch of keys hanging from his belt in front, it’s a way to show his masculinity.
It’s the same as when a woman wears thigh-high boots, a push-up bra, high heels, long eyelashes, long hair, long nails, long earrings, and similar.
When men brag:
When a man says something nice and impressive about himself, he wants the woman to confirm it.
That’s the “secret” signal he’s sending to her.
But often, the woman feels that he is acting like a pompous jerk and makes a strong effort to “bring him back down to earth.”
When she belittles and criticizes him, it’s her attempt to make him more modest and humble.
But the opposite happens, often leading to misunderstandings and arguments in the relationship.
Negative Signals
Hidden negative signals from both genders can manifest as:
- dangling feet
- hand over the mouth
- excessive blinking
- rubbing eyes
which can be signs of boredom.
It may be challenging to read your partner’s not-so-clear signals – but what if both of you had better strategies and habits, so you didn’t have to worry about reading and adjusting, but could instead easily and effortlessly fulfill your desires and meet your needs?
You can quickly and easily learn better communication strategies and gain greater understanding of your differences through couple coaching.
Conclusion
The most important thing, however, is that you feel comfortable and at ease with yourself. You are relaxed and confident.
This will attract and retain the man/woman you are interested in.
But of course, it’s always easiest if you can interpret the signals that are there.
This applies both in traffic, at the workplace, and of course also between genders before and during a relationship.
Do you need to learn more about women’s and men’s hidden signals?
Do you want to know more about how to create and maintain a good relationship?
I would like to offer you a no-obligation free clarifying conversation over the phone, where I will help you gain clarity on what kind of life and relationship you desire, as well as identify the main obstacles that prevent you from achieving what you want.
These two clarifying points will illuminate the necessary steps you need to take to reach your goals.
Call me at +45 – 21 79 18 50 to schedule a time for the free clarifying conversation.
Are you thriving ♥ – or is your relationship in pain?
- I can save and improve your relationship quickly and effectively with very concrete communication tools and strategies, so you come to understand each other.
- If the relationship is in chaos with fear, anger, confusion, or stress, there may be a need for overview, structure, and firm mutual rules to create mutual understanding of each other.
- I am a sort of driving instructor, teaching the “Traffic Rules of Relationships”. In a way, it involves both theory, parallel parking, city driving, night driving, and skid driving. All of this must be thoroughly learned before you find your own driving style – also in the relationship!
If you want to find out if I can help you and your partner, please call me at phone +45 – 21 79 18 50
See more articles in English at www.parforhold-parterapi.dk/couples-therapist