10 Questions for the Relationship
How to talk about the deep and important questions with your partner.
If it is too difficult, it might be a good idea to do it together with a third person who has no emotional agenda with either of you, but who, for example, offers couples therapy. Preferably choose a professional couples therapist in Copenhagen with experience.
You can of course also try it yourself.
Copy the questions for your relationship below in two copies, and answer each individually. Then compare your answers with each other and talk about how you can get closer to your common goals and what it takes to overcome the challenges.
- What aspects of your partner do you like?
- How did you perceive your partner in the beginning?
- How do you perceive your partner today?
- Which words/feelings do you think best describe your relationship?
- How do you experience your intimate/sexual relationship?
- What desires do you have for your relationship?
- What aspects of your partner do you not like so much?
- Which situations do you find the most challenging in your relationship?
- What do you understand by the words “respect for each other“? What do you personally do to respect your partner?
- What resources do you have as a couple together?
Help from Outside
If it is very difficult to open up and talk about the most embarrassing/painful/awkward topics, it might be a good idea to do it in the company of a professional couples therapist, who can create a safe environment for you, where you learn to speak responsibly so that neither you nor your partner feels the rug pulled out from under them or other unpleasantness.
A couples therapist will create structured, agreed, fixed, safe frameworks for your communication so that you are both able to understand each other, but also that each of you feels understood by the partner.
There is nothing wrong with feeling that it is awkward and strange to talk about the above ten topics. If it had been easy, you would have done it a long time ago…
It will probably also feel both artificial, awkward, and strange to sit and talk about these things together with a third person.
The truth is, what you have done so far has felt natural, easy, and simple – but has it given you the results you want? THEREFORE, it will naturally feel both inauthentic, insane, difficult, and similar – for you to get something different and better…..
See more articles in English at www.parforhold-parterapi.dk/couples-therapist about couples counseling, couple therapy, couples coaching and couples therapy Copenhagen.